- 30.07.2009 -

Sitting at the corner of the pc room, previously was MacDonalds, staring at the clock waiting it to reach 10.00 , however, it seems slow..

Well, time is a torturing one ... especially when I am waiting.. There's nothing much I could do right now, feeling disappointed actually.. Perhaps, I should not expect that much from my education program..I wish I could end this shit as fast I could..

My friend asked me to read newspaper.. But in my point of view, newspaper is filtered by the authority..Sadly, newspaper actually shape people's thinking ...That's not really a fact though,but it is a fact in sociology,that's what I learned years ago. Some read it for entertainment..For me,I read newspaper occasionally just for the sake of reading..For me, I enjoy seeing disasters than landed on human, as such Tsunamis and Earthquakes.. It is a fact that this world is overpopulated and the highly populated world is a factor of congestion.. Biological weapons, nuclear weapons, powerful weapons,they are all bullshit ... nothing can be more dangerous than human being..Humans fight for space and oxygen. The higher the quantity of humans, the lower the space for them..

Humanity should come to an end ...
Some people would leave,some people would stay,voluntarily or involuntarily..
The question is "why is it so difficult to die?"

- 29.07.2009 -

This post today is mainly about a part of humanity..
I just couldn't stand why humans are hasty and do not think..This statement goes to me as well.. How could I tolerate nuisance from such thing.. For example, the speed limit on the road is 60 km/j and I was driving 60km/j.. There is just a driver honking and flash lighting me.. Imagine, how peaceful if everyone manages their time and resources efficiently, I can forsee there would be an efficient society as well.. I assumed that the driver who did that to me was rushing to work or something.. And worst part was.. I had to bear the cost of his externality.. This is just part of the statement. The worse thing I observed was 90% of the people daily can be categorized as "perform without thinking and even observing". The speed limit has its reason, and the sign there has its reason as well.. Are they blind? I wish 2012 is really the day that the world is going to end.. People like that are worst than animals. For me, I tried my best to think,although it takes more time.. I can even relate this statement to the people I met years ago, months ago... Most of them are the same...At least I realize how important it is to think before proceeding.. If I could reach 100% calmness and 0% hastiness.. I probably already achieve the goal as a human..

- 28.07.2009 -

Today is the day I attended my 1st CIB (Communication in Business) class.. Well, it was a 3 hours class but reduced to 2 1/2 hours just for today..It was and can be said is a blessing that my lecturer turned out to be a nice one. How fortunate this world will be if 90% of the people are so nice and polite. Perhaps, this is her job and she as a CIB lecturer has to communicate nicely to others, convey her messages efficiently.
This subject is essential for my future I assume. Even if I scored a pass in my Accounting, but I think scoring a distinction in this subject will alleviate me to a better level. Well, technically it is important to score in my MAIN subjects such as accounting and finance.. But, I can forsee how important is COMMUNICATION in future..
After today's class, I can see how poor is my communication skill in real life.. The equilibrium I "achieved" so far I assume was due to my communication skill. Maybe, this is because me myself chose this path but not my communication skill...I still see no light of hope in humans after all...Nothing will change, everything remains the same..

- 25.07.2009 -

Well, holiday left 2 mere days.
Been busy in clicking and clicking in facebook applications...
Especially in pet society..
Hence,it's all coming to an end...
Feet injuries due to basketball, thus can relax and recuperate myself for days..
However,going back classes is a pain in the ass because I have to walk in college..
In addition, my new units will not be as easy as before because it is all about mathematics and this is my weakness. Fortunately, I still have my burning desire inside that I will make the best out of it.. At the end of the day, I will find out which factor will be outlasted by the other factor...Living in an optimistic way is the same as pessimistic way because they two hold one similar truth, which is reality..
I have to endure for the next 14 weeks..

- 21.07.2009 -

Holiday is going to end for me..Well,I wish and hope semester 2 will be a nice semester...Hopefully there are no nuisances and idiots in semester 2.

Well, what goes around comes back around.. The karma cycle... The vicious cycle of a phenomenon.. Blacks remained and labeled as "criminals" last time...

I believe, one fine day,I would break and free myself from "this" cycle..I had enough of this shit already since last 2 years. I felt tormented and suffered from mental breakdown when I get to know the "truth"..

Impartiality will never be real... And worst part was I have and had to bear the cost of idiots and nuisances..and it turned out I am the most fragile and it SHOULD be a priority to protect me..but it was other way round.. Well, even one fine day when I successfully break out and free myself from this cycle, I promise that I would treat others good..Perhaps as a token of appreciation or otherwise..

I could see how dangerous people are..sometimes, I hold my tears and sometimes, I couldn't. Well, this would be a nice lesson to me as I see what quality Malaysians have. I couldn't generalize that all humans are the same..but trust me, all are alike..because we share one common thing.. BLOOD COLOUR.. sometimes I even wished that I have blood which is BLUE in colour..Well,it will never happen..

My biggest wish in this world is not wealth, nor successful life..
To terminate the entire human race...
Life is all about hatred and grudges...

- 09.07.2009 -

Results were released days ago..precisely, it was 2 days ago.
I realized something important...
I will never go far in life..
As I will never achieve the best in everything although I have a lil talent in things..
As I was listening to Miley Cyrus - The Climb, the part of the lyrics suited my life...
" I can almost see it...",sadly sadly..
Once again,I was feeling-less when I saw my results..
It was so borderline and 1 mark could make so much difference...
But I was glad that it is all over...nothing to fret...just have to buck up my assignments next semester..that is all I could do..
Struggling in studies is not my concept..
But knowing syllabuses in real life and know how to apply is my aim...
"I can almost see my goal"...but the 1 mark made so much difference..
But I thank destiny as what people usually say "Life is never easy"..

- 07.07.2009 -

What filled up my time during these few days?
The answer is 2MB,obsolete 1993 game.
I spent around 30 hours in it I assume..
The game is something like Pokemon...but it was played in my laptop..
Well,it was quite fun though..
The game is quite difficult..
As without a proper guide or walkthrough from the web,it is impossible to finish the game in 30 hours.Perhaps 30 days.
Besides,this game requires substantial determination and patience..
In solving quests and missions,the player would encounter many enemies which is inevitable..
But, the story of the game is marvelous...
Phrases that intrigued me are:"why?why do you want to kill me?"
"why don't you understand that destruction of the world is fate?"
"why don't they want to die?"

Anyway,this game rocks..
can get free download for the web.Just google "Breath Of Fire 2 SNES"

- 02.07.2009 -

Oh my goodness.. I finally realized how happy are people around me..
I mean I could really see happiness in them...
I am so confined in my own space..
Is there any threshold for me to the light?
My life is so darkened by sadness and sorrowfulness..
Some enjoying boozes,some enjoying sports,some enjoying hanging out..
Oh my God..so many kinds of happiness...
Unity brings happiness..
But how am I gonna start and build the empire of happiness?
I couldn't simply conjure happiness and light in my life...
I need network,network and network...
But I couldn't do shit right now...
Even the most emotional person I saw would be happy in part of the 24 hours in his life...
Now my life equals to a GG.